Don’t Be A Bad Wife. -Part II, Michal

But when David returned to bless his household, Michal the daughter of Saul came out to meet David and said, “How the king of Israel distinguished himself today! He uncovered himself today in the eyes of his servants’ maids as one of the foolish ones shamelessly uncovers himself!” -2 Sam 6:20

David had been rejoicing before the Lord in dance as the ark of the covenant returned to Jerusalem -something worthy of celebration. David celebrated in a way that Michal perceived as beneath David’s royal position.

David got it right, and Michal got it wrong.

He understood, that even as king of Israel, God was his King, and worthy of not only a royal processional, but of humble worship. David was worshipping God, and that, with abandon.
For Michal, who had been influenced by her now deposed father, humble worship was foreign to her, and she despised her husband, the king, for his dance of praise.

Worship is the one right thing for all men and women. Do you know that? It is the one thing that is really necessary. Remember Mary and Martha? Jesus commended the one who sat at His feet and worshipped Him.
It is that moment when we bow to God, acknowledging who He is, and who they are before Him.
I wonder how many trials of life would dissolve, if we would take that position more often, even as a lifestyle.
Something I have noticed over the years, is how many Christian men refuse to sing to Jesus during worship at church, -seemingly afraid to look or sound foolish, perhaps afraid to engage on en emotional level.

I’m sure very few Christian women would be like Michal, despising their husband for worshipping God.
However, it is possible, to hinder them in other ways. Do you quickly yield when your man wants to serve at church at the expense of time with you and the family? Do you support him fully, or is your own neediness your priority? I’ll let you in on a secret,… if you support your husband in every spiritual pursuit, you will have a better husband. The question is, do you trust the Lord enough to release him to worship? Try commending him, even encouraging him to serve, to be involved, to go on retreats, etc…. yes, at your emotional expense.

I’m not advocating that husbands abandon or neglect their wives,.. in no way do I support that. But when a man  begins to make the Lord more of a priority in his life, his partner should wholeheartedly support that -even if it costs her some of his time and attention.

Worship by it’s very nature takes the priority off of us and our needs, and puts it on God, who is worthy of our praise, and sacrificial attention.

How sad that David’s day of happy celebration ended with this kind of insensitive and heartless reception from his own wife, but often God’s servants go quickly from the glory of the mountain to the shadows of the valley.—Wiersbe

 

Don’t Be A Bad Wife. -Part I, Zipporah

Then Zipporah took a flint and cut off her son’s foreskin and threw it at Moses’ feet, and she said, “You are indeed a bridegroom of blood to me.” So He let him alone. At that time she said, “You are a bridegroom of blood”— because of the circumcision. -Ex 4:25-26 (NASB)

Moses was a Hebrew and Zipporah was a Midianite. When they married, neither one of them would have any idea about what God was going to call Moses to. Moses had not circumcised his son yet, so Zipporah did it, and it seems, from this passage, that circumcision was something that was pretty objectionable to her. Her attitude, may have been what held Moses back from being obedient. Nevertheless, it is what God required of His people, the Hebrews. I believe at this point in Moses’ life, he was under tremendous personal strain, having been told by God that he was going to be used by God to confront Pharaoh and deliver the nation of Israel from their Egyptian slavery.
Few of us can imagine the relational strain that must have been going on between Moses and his wife. After all, she didn’t sign up for all of this! With her outburst, again, it seems that she probably wasn’t a fan of this bloody rite that her husband’s God commanded and she may not have been a fan of him running off to Egypt either.

Now, there is a big difference between this relationship and your relationship (or future relationship), however there may be some similarities. I think it’s easy for some women to try and hold back their husbands from pursuing God fully. Here is why …

1. Pursuing God fully means sacrifice. When a man is following God, it can mean everything from  living where God wants, versus where you want, to how much disposable income you have, (assuming one is obedient in giving.) It means getting up early for church. It means being involved in service. It means sacrificing time.

2. Pursuing God fully takes faith. One common failure in marriage, is when women do not trust the Lord enough to trust or encourage their husbands in what God puts on their heart. I want to be clear, (I can hear the objections) this isn’t the case with all women, but certainly many, and it only applies where men are actually wanting to follow God. But where men are trying to follow God with their life and family, there should be faith filled support and encouragement from their wives, not skepticism and scorn.

3. Pursuing God as a married couple takes partnership. Husbands and wives need to be on the same team, fighting for the same cause. In political circles, one of the oddest couples out there is James Carville and Mary Matalin. James is a pretty radical, outspoken Democratic strategist, and Mary is a Republican strategist – they work for different teams. How that works for them I have no idea, but in the spiritual realm, that is a nonstarter. It just does not work. In my pursuits as a pastor, trying to follow God’s will, I simply could not do it, if my wife was not a partner in that pursuit. Truth is, she is my cheerleader!

Wives, make sure that you are not a Zipporah, when your husband shows interest in spiritual matters, encourage him. Free him up to follow God, cheer him on, pray for him! Yes, it will mean sacrifice, but the dividends will pay off for you and your family with God’s blessings. And, I can say, when your man feels God blessing him in his spiritual pursuits, you will have a happy and content husband.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart And do not lean on your own understanding.
Prov 3:5 (NASB)

 

Why I Support Referendum 74

Any time a pastor or church gets involved in what are labeled as political issues, there is usually some push-back, from friends and foes alike. There are those who say that is an unnecessary offense, and not part of the “mission of the church.” Others simply disagree with the position that the pastor or individual takes.
So, why take up any “political” issue, and why this one?
Here is my response:

Marriage is biblically and historically defined as a God-ordained institution and covenant between a man and a woman. In a free society where we have the right and ability to influence legislation, I find it to be shameful to not stand up for the biblical definition of marriage as it has existed since the beginning of time. From where I sit, this is not a political issue, it is a moral one, being decided in the political arena.

The family (one man, one woman, children) is the foundation of society, and in spite of troubles with marriage in general it is important to maintain the fabric of society that it brings. Every study of the family proves this to be true. Redefining marriage will come with educating public school children to accept the new definition, adding confusion and damaging the future of the foundation of the family.

To be against the redefinition of marriage is not to be against homosexual couples. Though I disagree with homosexual practice, I am not against homosexual individuals, I think a distinction can be made.
I do not seek to take away any rights or privileges from homosexuals, nor do I seek to dictate to them how they should live. The offense is actually the reverse.

Currently, Washington State law provides for civil unions, enabling homosexual couples to enjoy many of the same legal and financial benefits of married couples, I think that is enough. Should SB 6239 be enacted, current civil unions would be dissolved, forcing couples to then be married if they would seek the same privileges that they currently enjoy.

If you believe in the biblical definition of marriage, you should sign Referendum 74 and Initiative 1192.
Let’s not redefine marriage in Washington State.

 

Girls, Jesus Loves You, Even If Your Pastor Doesn’t

I read a quote today that made me want to gag. In her review of Mark & Grace Driscoll’s book “Real Marriage“, former Mars Hill women’s ministry leader Wendy Alsup says the following:

“Mark said in the same Acts 29 Bootcamp message referenced earlier that the pastor’s wife has the “most important job” in a new church — “having sex with the church planter.”
Wendy goes on to ask the following question: “I wonder what the Driscoll’s story would be if Grace became incapacitated long term.”

The focus on sex as being so incredibly important in marriage, and to men, is, in my opinion, frighteningly far off course from what the bible and Jesus teaches. Jesus, in fact elevated the role of women in society. Almost all of what women enjoy in terms of cultural equality and worth comes from His teaching. Jesus honored the woman at the well in the face of cultural bias. Jesus honored women who were notorious sinners in the same way that he embraced men who were sinners. Jesus honored and cared for His mother in His final hour. The Apostle Paul taught us that men should love their wives as Christ loved the church – an indication of loving sacrifice.

As a husband, and the father of four daughters, the idea that sexual performance is elevated to the primary function of a married woman is offensive to me. My guess is, that it is pretty offensive to women as well. Sex is an important part of a healthy, loving marriage, the bible is clear on that. But the over emphasis of it is unhealthy, and in my opinion, detrimental to the goal of a loving relationship. Missing is the idea of mutual submission, servitude, and self control.

Ladies, Jesus sees you as much more than a pin cushion for your husband, or future husband. While the world markets you as sexual objects created for the enjoyment of men, you must realize that this is a lie of the Devil. You are, in fact, a precious and wonderful gift. You are princesses, and queens, partners and friends, to be loved and cherished, by those enlightened enough to see you as daughters of the King.

If you are troubled in soul, or body, or if you are wounded, and unable to be as healthy as you would like… you are all the more loved, and all the more recipients of God’s grace.
Girls, rest in the knowledge that Jesus loves you, He has grace for you, and it is enough.